A few months ago, I enrolled in the Chocollect thingy from Mars. That finished last year, and I got some cinema tickets, some ringtones and other such pap from it. My biggest problem - the codes inside Bounty bars never worked. I'll explain why thats an issue in a moment.

Anyway - they have now launched a new one called Get It 1st. So I registered, put in my code from my Bounty bar and hey presto - the fucking thing didnt work did it. Bunch of arseholes!

Being allergic to milk narrows down my choice of chocolate quite considerably and a Dark Bounty is fine. But, oh no, dont let the sodding codes work on the website. Tossers! What have they got against people with dairy allergies? I guarantee that if I go downstairs and get a normal Mars Bar, the code will work. Aargh!

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[link]   Posted @ 12:07

Loads of updates today...

My favourite bicycle of the 70s (apart from the Grifter is making a comback. Check out this BBC new item about the Chopper being remade by Raleigh.

Those crazy Americans (not all of them, as a lot I have met are lovely). They really should put some planning and aforethough before they get involved with this jape.

Ever fancied building your own face? Do it here (java required)

Click here for more ASCII art/movies, etc than you can shake a really big tree trunk at.

Ever fancied sending an Insensitivity Card to someone?

Lots of people get hold of keygen programs to open up various items of software. This is like that, but for getting access to various web sites :)

Ever needed to render a whole page into a BMP for display purposes? Better than piecing together screen grabs.

And finally, a new item about one of my favourite things - Etch-a-sketch

Enjoy :)

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[link]   Posted @ 14:45

Following the suicide of Harold Shipman last week, I was unundated with jokes to my mobile over the weekend. Thought I would share them here. No apologies for the bad taste:

NEWSFLASH... Shipman found dead. Early tests have revealed he was unhappy with the food in jail. he was last heard saying "I could murder a granny smith".

Killer doctor Harold Shipman has died after being found hanging in his cell. A prison spokeman said Shipman has simply run out of patience (sic).

Commenting on Harold Shipmans death, Wakefields Prison Governor said he would be sorely missed by the prison boxing team, as he had a truly lethal jab.

What do Harold Shipman and Gareth Gates have in common? Neither can finish a sentence.

It's been said that Harold Shipman was a bit of a lady killer. maybe thats got something to do with the fact he's well hung.

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[link]   Posted @ 11:01

Well, what did I say? I said I was expecting things to get stupid - and they did.

When I dropped Rhiannon off, I asked to see Chandler and Bimbo reluctantly agreed. He was peppered in chicken pox scabs - poor lamb. Still, he was pleased to see me, so that was good.

As I got up to leave, I said to the kids that I would see them on Friday, to which Bimbo replied that she wanted to drop the midweek evenings as the kids were tired and irritable the next day. I replied that I already had (dropped every Wednesday) and that was why we had gone for the Friday. She wouldnt have it and threw in my face that there was no contact/consent order and I was lucky to have what I did! Instead of arguing, I got up, said bye to the kids and Pete and walked out. Pete just sat there and didnt say a thing! Some mate, eh.

Spoke to Shell (who was at her grans) on the phone and sat in my car, trying to keep a curb on my tears. How can she do this to me? Does she get some kind of perverse pleasure out of hurting me? This stems back to the school thing and me putting my foot down, so she is trying to get me back for that. Well - tough luck lady - I'm not being walked over again.

She left a message on my ansa-phone later, saying that Pete had told her she was being too harsh (so he did come through. Cheers) and could I call her and talk about what we could do about the Fridays - maybe make it earlier. For gods sake - I leave work at 1615 as it is on Friday to get back for 1700. The 2 prior trains are at 1530 and 1600 which, although doable, mean I would lose a lot of working time on the Friday.

Well, I'll get something sorted out. I just hope she doesnt go completely bonkers about it all this time. We were thinking of asking them about swappng weekends, so that I could spend more time with Shell - but I may have to use a back door route to get that :)

Picked Shell up last night and headed into town to meet her dad - Russell. He told us he was in Route 66, but he wasnt there when we got there. Shell called him and he was actually in Junction 21 (a pub that used to be called the "Roaring Forties"). His excuse, as he was bollocksed, was that it was road related with a number in. As an after thought, it was also an excuse to make sure Shell hadnt told anyone where he was, in case they found him!

We ended up in Cheers for a few hours and headed home around 11pm after stopping off at Deniz' for some grub. Hmm - chicken...

Shell has been my rock recently, whenever I have had any problems about the kids - and well, generally everything really. She may be younger than me, but she has bucket loads of common sense (which I lack), which put us on a par really. I know she reads here sometimes, so Thanks Shell - I love you.

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[link]   Posted @ 09:18

Had yesterday off work (took holiday) and did nothing at all. Apart from collecting a parcel (my new shoes from Schuh). Spent the rest of the time in bed and with Shell. Awesome.

Went to pick up the kids last night, but only Rhiannon came with me. Chandler was ill and I didnt get to see him. Bimbo was really cold and we stayed outside the house when we collected Rhiannon. So no Chandler and no clothes for Rhiannon. I had to go back and get some from her this morning. I'm expecting things to get stupid again :)

Its quite funny, as on Thursday night, we went to Cheers as usual and her and Pete completely blanked us all evening. I suspect it stems back to last weekened and the name changing thing. Idiots! I'm surprised at Pete though, I always thought he had more sense about things like that. Ho-hum!

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[link]   Posted @ 13:46

Got pointed to this article from the BBC. Some people obviously arent doing it right. Anyone care to comment? According to the BBC, they cant get verified information that it actually works. Comments?

Shell got another tattoo yesterday - on her wrist, her right wrist. I will post a photo when she allows me to photograph it. Its got my name on. So thats it - she is mine forever now :)

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[link]   Posted @ 09:48

I stopped ordering from DVDSoon a while back, for a couple of reasons. They are no longer customs friendly, their prices have been hiked and I needed to open a new account as I had changed address.

Today however, I found a saviour - DVD Pacific. They are cheap, customs friendly and I have ordered loads of stuff today (about �100 worth) to be shipped over the next couple of months. Bonus!

Included in the order was May, Finding Nemo and House of the Dead. For some reason, the R1 release of Cabin Fever is 1.33:1 and not Widescreen - WTF!

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[link]   Posted @ 14:18

Always a thing to be ph34r3d in a relationship. Or maybe you have a sister (and definately a mother, at some point in your life), female flat mate, etc. Frankly, all you need is a female that you spend time with. Excluding traffic wardens and whores.

Go and get this - PMS Alert. A windows application, where you enter details of the female in your life and it will warn you about things on a monthly basis. How handy is that?

Spoke to Dave last night about my Cavalier. He can have a look at it next week and will even help tow it up. It needs the following:
1/ Get it started
2/ Give it a service
3/ Get an MOT
Once thats done - I can dump the Volvo (when the tax runs out) and then drive around in a far nicer car - which is bigger, faster, more comfortable and doesnt leak. Hopefully there is nothing too wrong with it :)

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[link]   Posted @ 10:05

Just picked up my email to find a card from someone on imood that says "Hiya, just stumbled across your site its great! u seam a nice blokie 2! im from weston too, so if u fancie dropping me a line, feel free 2 do so, xxx EDITED@aol.com".

Well I am from Weston, I am a nice blokie, but I have my Shell. Thx anyway :)

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[link]   Posted @ 18:53

Just a few short months ago, Monday nights used to be a matter of going to Sands to drink, dance and fail to pick up women.

Now, not so much.

We went there last Monday, and the place was empty, as opposed to heaving like it was a couple of montsh back. We didn't even bother going yesterday, although we were tempted. It was fun but horrendous when it was busy - last week it was quite pleasant.

So last night, Shell and I tried to go to Cheers - but they were closed. I was devastated! Due to maintenance (ie. fixing a hole in the wall). Everywhere we went was completely deserted, the weather was foul, so we went home around 12.30 after visiting the Imperial and the Cabot. Had a great time talking about drunken experiences (some of which I should document here) and past relationships, but instead of being in a group of chatting people, we only saw about 3 people we knew the whole night.

When I got home yesterday, I had been carded by ParcelFarce saying that they would deliver again today. Thank god for that, I thought, as it it would mean I wouldnt have to drive up there to collect it.

No such luck. This morning, I wander downstairs to find another card - timed at 8.15am. I was there! I was in bed (admittedly) but I didnt hear the doorbell or anyone knocking on the door. Now I have to go and collect them damn thing. And I have absolutely no idea what it is! At all! Or who it might be from.

Article of the day is How to become an obnoxious internet cam whore in five easy steps. Class :)

And reading on Ananova that Buffy star Alyson Hannigan has been practising her orgasm technique.. just gets me all quivering. In fact, just read the first part of the first sentence and forget the rest of it. It isnt as interesting as the start of the article.

And also for The IRC Bible. Work colleagues looked at me blankly as I fell about laughing and/or rammed my shirt into my mouth.

And 2 games to play: 3 Ball Pong and Spaced Penguin

Thanks to Dead Man Jones for finding those nuggets.

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[link]   Posted @ 11:51