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So, another day, another update.
Nothing techy or net related today. Just some personal thoughts about life, the universe and the debilitating effect of being lactose intolerant.
My mate Jon is currently going through the grinder in his relationship. He has an unstable partner, 2 kids and a job with responsibility. If anyone cares to read through my archives, they will know that I have been through a similar situation in the past.
One thing I have learnt from that and from peoples interactions with me, is that no-one really knows what you are going through. My experience qualifies me to empathise with his situation - it doesnt give me the right to criticise his choices or give any advice. So to those persons that are trying to - back off and shut up. Unless you are him (which you aren't), you don't know what is going on inside his head. In fact, I doubt if he knows what is going on inside his head - I know I didn't.
I am not allowed to comment on my experiences (due to a court order) but I can imagine what he is going through:
1. going to sleep makes you nervy - because you don't know what the next day will bring
2. waking up is nervy - from the moment you wake up, you are on tenterhooks waiting for something to happen
3. there is an inability to have a conversation with your partner that doesn't degenerate into a shouting match
4. you spend your whole time thinking about what you are going to say next, in the vain hope it doesn't get taken the wrong way
5. you worry about leaving your kids with someone who is unstable on a daily basis
6. your work suffers because you are pre-occupied or "working from home" in order to keep an eye on your kids
7. you start fantasing about splitting up (cos it would be easier) and working out plans in your head
8. you worry about the money situation if you split up
9. you worry about seeing your kids if you split up
10. goddamn it - you worry everything whether you stay together or split up
In short, it's tricky, stressful and soul destroying.
I bless my cotton socks that I am now in a relationship that is so different than my previous ones. No longer do I worry about walking through the door from work and having utensils and food thrown at me for no reason. No longer do I have to worry about random abuse and physical attacks.
In my experience, things get worse before they get better - and generally, the outcome is never what you expected.
Anyway, onto different matters. Shell has complained that I don't mention her on here anymore. But when I did, she complained about that. She has however, congratulated me on 2 things: 1/ not mentioning things as boring as shopping lists and 2/ being completely boring.
Thats why I would like to make some progress with my 2 other sites - with one of them being a collaborative blog about all sorts of anything and one being techy (because 1/2 the people I know are geeks).
I keep trying to get Shell to start blogging as well - she could do an entry on each pair of shoes she has ever bought, telling you where she got them, how much she paid, why she bought them, which outfits they go with, etc, etc. If she started today and did 1 entry per day, she would just about finish by the end of the year...
The only other news I have, is that since Saturday, Shell and I have been trying to rid the house of cat fleas. With 3 cats and a heatwave combined - things have got a little crazy. The cats have been treated, the carpets and beds have been sprayed and we are now mopping up the existing generation (the spray/cat treatment kills the eggs and stops more) through the use of bowls of water on the floor (fleas have a knack for being attracted to water although they are incapable of swimming in it and drown within seconds) and using ourselves as honeypots. We stand there - wait for them to jump on us and then do them in. Its brutal but it has to be done.
And now - lactose intolerance. Its a shitty thing to have...
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